There is nothing that annoys me more than stupid people. And by stupid people, I don't mean your run-of-the-mill dumb asses who can't answer the following question *credit goes to the book/movie Idiocracy*:
If you have one bucket that can hold two gallons, and another bucket that holds five gallons, how many buckets do you have?
If you can't answer that question, then you don't annoy me, but only by virtue of the fact that you now have an ice pick in your eye. Hey, don't look at me like that...it was a public service. I swear. However, I digress.
Stupid, in this sense, refers to a broad variety of people. In general, stupid people in this usage covers one ore more of the following list:
People who simply won't. shut. the. fuck. up.
People who are disgustingly loud-so much so that when they speak, your eardrums start cowering in fear.
People who are USELESS. This is huge for me-if you have intelligence, talent and drive, and all you do is sit at your desk and play fucking computer games or other useless crap for hours and hours and do absolutely nothing productive like go back to college, get a job or work to pay off your student loans, you suck. A LOT. Not that I'm referring to a specific person here, or anything...yeah. This is merely an example.
People who attempt to portray themselves as intelligent, and do not realize that all they are doing is proving their utter ignorance and incompetence.
People with absolute zero work ethic, especially as applies to
group projects.
People who focus their entire existence on being dicks. Speaking of which, I'll have to post the flow chart I made eventually, regarding a certain person always being a dick. No matter what.
Etc.
As you can see, this list covers a LOT of people. Yet, without fail, they annoy me. If they would do such brilliant things as relieve themselves of their ignorance, wear a muzzle 24/7 or voluntarily get kicked in the ass so as to start being productive, than I would cease to have (much of) a problem with them. However, as things stand, I can't stand you.
This brings me to my easy check list:
HOW TO TELL IF YOU ARE A "STUPID PERSON"
1) You read articles on CNN/The New York Times/etc, find one statement that seems intelligent and repeat it as much as you can.
2) When you talk, laugh, yell, sing or make sounds, small animals keel over and die.
3) When you talk, people who are generally considered to be intelligent either keel over and die or start laughing. Conspicuously.
4) Your name is Sarah Palin.
5) You are a product of incest (see #4).
6) You sometimes get stuck in doorways. Because of your head.
7) You live in Alabama/Georgia/other like states (see #5).
8) You are extremely intelligent, and yet contribute absolutely nothing to your family, society or your bank account.
9) Your idea of a busy day is having three raids schedule on World of Warcraft, or its equivalent.
10) You really enjoy arguing. WITH PEOPLE THAT AGREE WITH YOU.
I can't think of anything else to add at the moment, but suggestions are, as always (*note*-not really always. I'm a bitch like that) are welcome.
Eventually, I will post the "Stupid Person Survival Guide", in which I shall detail what drastic measures must be taken when you encounter one of these heathens.
Cheers.
